Newsletter February 2004 by Cathy Combs

Contemplations of Sowing and Reaping

It is a beautiful sunny, uncharacteristically warm day on the morning of Winter Solstice as I sit here contemplating my present moment that is the seed of what February will be! I am so joyfully, quietly aware of the present and future that I am building. I am peacefully, humbly grateful for the awareness that once again reminds me "Do not take it personally. This trip you’re on is not about ego." As I remember that and embrace that Truth my life is so much easier, so much happier, so much lighter. I can feel my blood pressure go down. I can feel my arteries open and relax. I can feel my facial muscles relax and I can hear my laughter. I can’t tell you how happy all that makes me feel. The feeling is almost beyond words. Almost! (smile)

Here are a few words I would like to share with you about what I see that will keep me open to this kind of relaxed state of being. To embrace a reality that says it’s not personal I have to be open to a reality that says I am worthy; that we’re all innately good; that fear isn’t the essence of how we operate! I have to feed my being with loving thoughts. I have to look with eyes of love and trust. I have to have a heart filled with love, with hope, with faith, with peace! That doesn’t happen idly! That happens with conscious effort; that happens with wilfull release of bitterness, anger, and resentment; that happens each time I tell myself, "I truly love you and appreciate your efforts." Along with all this I include the incomparable necessity of giving thanks for every blessing; every blessing small and large. I cannot possibly underestimate the value of giving thanks. There is a healing on every level every time we give thanks. If we don’t feel it I take that as a clue to how much work I have to do; how much I have taken for granted and not seen! When I keep my focus on the wrong things I can’t see the blessings within and all around me.

As I sit here today on this Winter Solstice day I am fully aware that when February comes I will have a picture of how I spent my time these last six weeks and I will know that I can change my focus if I don’t like the fruits of my labor. In the agricultural realm of Earth and body February is still a time of planting, sowing for an upcoming harvest. It is also a time of thanksgiving for blessings received and blessings to come. Thanksgiving is the building block for happiness and strength and courage. I visit that altar often. I visit it often when I need healing, when I am willing to give myself a chance again. I visit that altar when I’m at my wits end and I either see no light at all or I see a faint glimmer.

February in many traditions is the time when the light of inspiration is celebrated. The Sun of Earth is getting brighter and casting a larger shadow. As we breathe in the light and energy of inspiration I remind myself not only breathe in but also breathe out; let go of all that is old so new shoots of green life can come up to add new life and beauty to my inner and outer world. As I feed myself and do my work I am ready, willing, and able to embrace my wide wide world of possibility and opportunity. Blessings of this growing season to you!!!

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