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2019: Heretics & Heroes:
Part IV of XII

by Cathy Combs


It's a cloudy mild day as we near the end of the current Mercury Retrograde cycle and what a fascinating ride it has been. I'm tired and yet so very grateful for all the blessings. A dear friend bought a copy of my book and was so excited that I offered to sign it we both were laughing and she even paid more than the asking price like so many others have done too. These sweet examples of Generosity so fly in the face of the unbelievable violence that fills the world and thankfully I never lose sight of all the Goodness and Generosity that's happening. If we all would hold that Vision what a different world we would create moment by moment. That's what we're here for and each moment I pray that we all keep waking up to that Possibility and Reality because It reflects who we really are and that is the lifeblood of Joy and Resilience!!!

As we move into April I think of the saying April showers bring May flowers and yet I know that with all the rain and ice up north the last thing we need is more rain because so much farmland has already been destroyed and I'm quite sure our farmers are struggling. A sweet synchronicity now just as I think of the Compassion that is so needed the Sun just came out! It's so sweet how often I think of a blessing and here it comes! That is a playful and very real reminder of the Power of our thoughts and feelings. Our Energy is creative! Whatever we are focusing on expands so we need to be very mindful of how we are spending and expressing our Energy! Another aspect of this Truth is the necessity of valuing the challenges in our lives. They're not meant to punish us. They're meant to Enlighten and Enliven us and lift us up to the next level of our Understanding. In a dualistic view of Life this isn't ever emphasized and yet the Reality is we are more than a duality. We are Wholeness in Expression. We are Spirit in Expression. This Truth brings in a Whole new view and a Whole new Clarity. As a biological entity geared toward the automatic fight, flight or freeze lizard brain reactiveness it is a real spiritual wake up call to remind myself again and again to breathe deeply and center in the present moment and remember yet again my Identity as Spirit in Expression. We are all on that same Journey and it is imperative to remember our Interconnectedness that allows Compassion and Peace. It's not an easy journey but it is so very meaningful and Joy-filled when we allow room for the inherent Gifts of the process to bless us each moment. It takes great Faith and Awakeness to be tuned into this process and not be pulled off center and buried by the heaviness that we can feel if we take this Journey personally and feel defeated by It!

I am reminded of a poem I wrote in the early 80s titled "The Lightness of the Dark Side". I love being outside at night and being in the countryside where I can see the stars. Years ago I was outside with a friend at night and we were both lying down on her driveway and watching the stars. It was absolutely Magical. The sky was filled with stars and it was so Beautiful!!!! Nature is so Gorgeous and yet it can cause so much damage at times it can be difficult to see or feel the blessing in whatever event is happening. We need to be using a wide angle lens often times to take in all that is occurring. I laughed as I was writing that last sentence thinking we need a wide angel lens too!!! I also remember a very dear friend who is now in the Spirit world of the nonphysical, Rev. Sallye Taylor, who said there is a lesson and a blessing in everything that happens. I do know the Truth of that and I use deep breathing to come back into that Truth whenever I need to so I can be open to the blessings in the difficult moments. That reminds me yet again of the biological entity I AM and Dr. Brene Brown's work in vulnerability. In a dualistic biological fear based world we are too often triggered by shame and pulled out of our Awareness of our Spirit Identity. Very much like Brene's journey I do not like feeling vulnerable and yet time and again I have experienced the Joy she is speaking of when I allow myself to be open and vulnerable. We're not taught to trust that in the fear based world that so many of us have grown up in and yet being willing to explore that Journey and Possibility is the lifeblood of Joy and Resilience and Awe and I really love those experiences so I am willing to go out again and again and stay out on the green growing edges of Life that Rev. Mary Manin Morrissey talks about in her work that I also study and love. It takes great, great Faith and Courage to be willing to stay Awake to each moment and yet I believe it certainly is worth it. I have been blessed time and again by being willing to step way out of my comfort zone and explore the Possibilities. The blessing is our Courage and Resilience and Compassion grow and grow each time we are willing to expand our boundaries! That's what our Journey is all about. That's why we're here in this physical world of Spirit. We're here to be a blessing and be blessed in return!

As I go forward into next month it is a big month: the anniversary of mom's death, the anniversary of my first book coming out, and my birthday. Between now and then I know there will be many blessings and lessons. I don't know what lessons and blessings are coming my way. I love Dr. King's statement: "We don't have to see the whole staircase. Take one step at a time and the next step will be revealed." I do know the Truth of that statement and I AM very mindful of the intense call of Awareness that takes to be Alive and Awake in the present moment and not be pushing past the present moment in a hurry to get to the future which we do not yet see in order to seemingly calm our anxiety. That reminds me of an Awareness I first had years ago when I heard myself say "We're not ready for the answer we're going to receive when we're pushing ourselves past the present moment." That's not quite the wording I first heard but it still captures the Truth of what I know. When we're forcing anything to a premature conclusion just so we don't have to deal with it anymore we're fooling ourselves. We've unleashed a monster far bigger than the current issue if we would've just remained focused and attentive to the Spirit Identity we are!!! "Haste makes waste" couldn't be truer!!! That reminds me of a cute comment I heard recently: "If we think we don't have time to do it right what makes us think we have time to do it again?" I love that question. It speaks to the paradox of what we create when we're in a fear-based hurry. We're asleep and can't possibly see what is in front of us! That's a Powerful call to the Dalai Lama's Mindfulness practice. Mindfulness is a heart-centered Awareness that always sees the Whole picture. It's a Powerful spiritual practice that serves us well in every moment. Bless us all as we go forward into each new moment firmly grounded in Love and Peace and Compassion!!!